You see the rainbow?

I lost a friend last week that I've known for as long as I can remember. It is always hard when someone you know passes. Its especially difficult when their your age. It forces you to look closely at your life. He was a great guy and hero to many. He will be missed by those who knew and loved him. His death made me truly think about this life I am living. Am I truly living? I am doing my best and wonder... could be doing more?

My friend Heather is home from the hospital. They found a bone marrow donor for her. Thanks for all of the prayers but her journey is just beginning. Please keep praying for her!! She has had chemo and will be returning to the hospital for thirty days. After she comes home she will be in her room for over three months. Not in the rest of the home where her two little children are but in her bedroom. I spoke with her today. She informed me that although she felt better physically she wasn't doing well mentally. Heather told me that she's afraid. I informed her that there was nothing wrong with her being afraid. Its a normal and expected reaction to illness and especially to cancer.

I implored her to remain faithful. I also told her that being in her bedroom for over three months was better than not coming back home at all. As I told her, its easier for me to say looking in from the outside, but its true. Option one... never come home from the hospital. Option two... come home and be locked in my master bedroom for three months with a laptop/iPad, bathroom, iPod and television. I'm going for option two!

I am in no way making light of her situation because its dire. Her journey isn't over. Its just beginning. What I am doing is searching for the rainbow before the rain has stopped. I have learned to do that in life. I get up in the morning because I see the sun shining brightly through the clouds, in the fog and in the rain. I have to. I never used to and my life was a reflection of such. Once I changed my way of thinking and my view on what truly matters in life. Now I see the rainbow during NOT after every storm!

Please keep Heather in your prayers no matter what faith, religion or language you pray in. Pray that God comforts and keeps her. After this 100 day journey she will start living again. Make sure you look at your today and embrace all that you have. Remember the importance of loving yourself so that you can be a light in the lives of others as my friend was...

You see the rainbow? You know I do...

Don't lose sight of your dreams!

I am feeling some kind of way today. I am not sure what to call it. I woke up refreshed after a long day working on Minister Steve's demo. I had a short work week but it was longer than others I've had recently. I think what I am feeling is being ready for something different. I love being a social worker but I think my mind and heart are pulling me in a different direction.

This music thing has been a part of me for many years. I remember wanting to do something with it along with my sisters when I was a teen. They didn't want to sing professionally and I didn't think I couldn't do it without them. So, I turned up the volume on my radio listening to other artists as their dreams of flowing over the airwaves came true. Secretly, my dreams were still there I just no longer shared them with others. I wrote poems, short stories and lyrics on scraps of papers, napkins and notebooks. I filed them away for safe keeping never to look at them again.

As an adult, I continued to write, write, write and only shared some of my work through poems that I gave to others. At this time in my life, my dreams are overpowering my thoughts forcing me to pay attention to them. Life experiences, both personally and vicariously, have brought them out of their hiding place. To see friends and family go through health related issues or other challenges in their lives has reinforced for me just how fragile life is. While writing quietly and trying to be a successful social worker, I may have not noticed some doors that were opened wide for me. As I am focusing on my dreams and changing my present situation, I've learned to enter those doors that my heart leads me to. I no longer have doubts about my future success as a songwriter, producer and manager. If I don't step out on faith I will accept a life (or career) that is no longer my desire.

I am satisfied completely with my personal life. God has blessed me beyond measure to be with someone who loves, trusts, supports and encourages me. Now I need to be as equally as satisfied professionally. I know that when you talk about it you are speaking it into existence. So, "I will be successful in this journey to complete, publish and share my literary works and song lyrics. I see it already but I just need and want to feel it!" I said it, God said it and it shall be done...

Success is there for the taking but you can't lose sight of your dreams. Tell God what you want and He shall provide. All doors God opens may not be for you but you have to run through the ones that are with your dreams in hand!

What do you know about favor?

What do you know about God's favor? I know what His favor has done for me. If it wasn't for His favor, I know where I'd be. That place wouldn't even be close to where I am now. That's why each day, all day, I thank God for His favor. He moved mountains for me and showed me the gifts I forgot I had. I am beyond thankful for His favor which has allowed me to stand tall in every situation embracing my victory before it even occurs.

Some folks walk around with arrogance spewing out their pores. They act as if they've become successful solely through their efforts with no amount of God's grace falling on them. Of course, we have to be steadfast and diligent as we work toward our goals and dreams. But one must recognize that it is God's favor that has allowed us to be. Whether our dreams and goals are met or not, God's favor has allowed us to accomplish even basic things. I woke up this morning, that's favor. I have my health and strength, that's favor. I have an abundance of love and encouragement in my life. That's favor. Favor isn't always fair, some folks say, but favor is favor to me. I embrace God's favor in all that comes my way...

I have stood and sometimes crawled through a few storms. Not having the strength and courage to stand, I almost faltered. I bent as far as I could embroiled in battles I wasn't sure I'd survive. With my eye towards the sky I prayed for help through each storm. The more I survived, the more I believed. As my faith increased so did my strength. To me... that's favor!

I stand today not worrying about things that don't matter in my life. I have reached deep within and found strength to make it through anything. I am not perfect and sometimes I do react stronger than I should. My imperfections make me human and I know I'm a work in progress and growth continues daily. I know also that I have come a very long way from where I stood twenty or even five years ago. Politics mean absolutely nothing to me. Worrying about what other folks do or say, means nothing to me. I am all about living this life God has given me to live. That's favor!

So... as you stroll through this life, climbing up this ladder of success, don't forget God's favor. It is your responsibility to use your gifts to succeed but one must look over their shoulder helping others along the way. God's favor was given to you and has guided your spirit to the place where you now stand. Don't forget where you came from as you stand tall looking out at the things you've accomplished. God's favor ain't fair but God's favor is good...

I promised God I'd stand...

I haven't done any posts for a few weeks. The biggest reason being that I haven't had any books to discuss. I've been collaborating on a few projects. Minister Steve and I are working hard to take his music ministry to another level. In addition, I was assisting someone with their bio and have a few things pending with this person. However, I'm not sure where we stand with that. I'm eagerly working with a friend on another project that I can't wait to complete. Its going to be great! Lyrics flow through my head daily so I'm writing songs too. I only need that one song to receive my Grammy. Yes, I already claimed it. I'm far from conceited. I'm faithful and speaking my desires into existence.

My interview was aired on www.107jamz.com last Sunday morning. It was both exciting and embarrassing for me. I've never been interviewed before. I like working behind the scene but God wanted me up front. He didn't want me to be a backup singer on this. So, I didn't pass up the opportunity. I took a deep breath and did my best. I thank Franyora Clophus for the amazing opportunity and wish her continued success with her Sunday morning Gospel show.

I'm truly grateful for the way things have transpired. Some things are falling into place and some have not changed. At times I may be doubtful but because I have faith, I know it will all come to fruition. I have stumbled and one some days tears have even formed. I don't let any tears fall because God has my back. I am who I am because of the journey my life has taken. There were moments when life knocked me down and I thought I'd never get back up. Once I stood, I promised God I'd never fall again. I haven't. I also promised Him that I cried my last tears for things I knew He'd bring me out of. Today I cry in the midst of my triumphs not for fear I won't get through things.

I always knew of God's promises so I asked for His help. With every fiber of my being I believed and He provided. Life comes with a lot challenges but as long as I stay pressed toward the mark things will be as I've envisioned. If things are getting a little heavy for you, ask God to help. Believe it in your heart and He will bring you through it. I am not telling you what I heard I am telling you what I know...